The Front Man War Treaty
Between all said members of ensembles, Commencing their Navigation across this Great Land of ours, to Terminate their Differences in such a manner, as to produce the Mutual Satisfaction and Good Understanding of the Populace It is further agreed, That all the ports and places on its Eastern side and Western Front be hitherto Delivered equal performances based on each Band's utmost abilities, to suitably Entertain and Annihilate. Special permissions have been granted to use the full power of Rocque.
Following the Conquest of aformentioned territories, each Rocque Ensemble shall be awarded One Medal pertaining to their finest achievements and fulfillments of Said Duties as outlined in this Treaty. These will be distributed in a Secret meeting amongst the Gentlemen at a later Date.
There shall be no Spandex worn below the Waist of said Gentlemen. It follows that Handkerchiefs worn about the knee will also not be tolerated, as such Gimmickry enflames Dangerous passions in the Female audience members, thus giving unfair advantage to the Perpetrator.
Neither shall the Stage be used as a common stalle for Merchandice and the Peddling of Wayres. All bands agree to uphold the Sanctity of the Stage and relegate the unseemly behaviour of Entrepreneuralism to a well-lighted corner of the Venue
Under no Circumstances shall Black Magik be used on stage to enliven a flagging set or to Vex thine opponents musical Performance. Symptoms of Demonic Dalliance- fyre-breathing, speaking in tongues, frenzied leaping from drums, the sacrifice of vyrginal tamborines and dueling guitar solos shall subject to a swift and vengeful punishment.
All Bands agree not to address the audience in a way that undermines the Covenant betwixt said Groups and their Holy Rocquepation. As for example, "Sorry, I've got a cold", "This is the first time we've played this one" and "We didn't get a sound check" reflect a pathetic desire to curry for the Audience's favour. Further, comments such as, "Do you wanna Rocque?" or "How's everybody doin' tonight?" are hateful redundencies that corrupt the blessed relationship betwixt group and said audience.
i)No shorts on stage.
ii)No Belching into Microphones
iii)Drummers shall not disrupt the Performence with meaningless interjections and poorly timed thoughts.
iv)Guitarists will stick to the Pentatonic Scales and avoid the Devil's Interval.
v)Bassists shall... oh who cares, just sit still.
Peace is everybody's responisibility. Please report any violations to the high tribunal at Chart Magazine.